Bastar - To Be Enough.

Nada te turbe,
nada te espante,
todo se pasa,
Dios no se muda;
la paciencia
todo lo alcanza;
quien a Dios tiene
nada le falta:
Sólo Dios basta.

Let nothing disturb you,

Let nothing scare you,

Whatever happens,

God is not moved.

Patience

is sufficient for everything

He who belongs to God

does not lack anything

God alone is enough.

I read this poem my sophomore year of college in my Introduction to Hispanic Literature class.  For some reason, that last phrase, Sólo Dios basta, has always stuck in my mind.  

I think that last word is what got me: basta, from the verb bastar. It means literally "to be enough." There isn't a one-word-equivalent in English, but it's a phrase, or an idea, that we use and think about quite a bit, even if we don't realize it. 

When I think about the word enough, I automatically think of food (if you know me, not a huge surprise there).  Almost every morning, I wake up a ravenous beast. I want to eat the largest bowl of cereal you can give me. Do you have a mixing bowl? Sure, I'll take it (okay, slight exaggeration). I, in my American way of thinking, am concerned that a small bowl of cereal won't be enough. It won't suffice. It won't satisfy my hunger. 

I have the same problem when I go to a restaurant. Being a girl, and knowing the enormous amounts of calories in many of the meals offered at restaurants, I often go for the "Under 500 Calorie Meal" or the "Healthy Choice," though I'd rather eat a giant bacon cheeseburger with a side of fries (sometimes I cave).   I'm never really concerned if the food will be good, just if it will be enough to satisfy my hunger.

But that question of satisfaction stretches to other areas of my life as well...

Am I pretty enough? 

Skinny enough? 

Spiritual enough? 

Smart enough? 

Good enough? 

AM I ENOUGH?  

No, I am not.

But for the first time ever in my life, I am finding joy in this truth. I cannot satisfy my deep desire for God. I cannot satisfy his requirement of perfection. I am too weak, too emotional, too doubtful, too sinful, too full of sin. I am resting in the truth that God says to me, when I am fearing my ability to accomplish His will, "You are NOT, but I AM." God, and God alone, is enough to satisfy. He covers my SIN through the BLOOD of His precious Son, Jesus. And through His blood, through Jesus, I find that I don't need anything else in the world except the presence of my God. 

HE ALONE IS ENOUGH. 

Sólo Dios basta.

God has said, 

"Never will I leave you; 

Never will I forsake you."

Hebrews 13:5b



Understanding with your Heart

Understanding. 

It is a word that has different meanings. First, in a literal sense, it means knowing the meaning of words, comprehending their significance, and applying them to your situation. This kind of understanding occurs in your brain.

There also, though, is a more figurative sense of the word, as portrayed by the rebellious teenage child when she screams at her mother:

You do NOT understand me!!! No one understands what I am going through!!!

This meaning of understanding has to do more with sympathy. It is caring. It is knowing where someone is and loving them where they are, despite how it affects you. This kind of understanding occurs in your heart.

(Are you happy that I gave you a 1st-grade lesson on the meaning of the word understanding? Don´t worry...it has significance. Keep reading please :)

Both types of understanding have been absolutely essential for my growth during my time in Spain, especially in regards to my host family.

Obviously, I have had to work really hard to understand completely what my host family and other Spaniards are saying to me.  Sometimes, I honestly cannot understand what they are trying to ask me or tell me, so I awkwardly come up with some kind of answer, knowing that many times, it is the answer to a completely different question. I have been so exasperated at times that I just settle for this type of interaction instead of truly trying to comprehend their question. Showing effort in even minute, simple details proves that you care about what they are saying.

It is only when I intently listen that I can see where they are coming from, sympathize with their feelings, and give them a hug to let them know you care.  It is only then that I can understand with my heart.

When I have given my host mom my absolute undivided attention, I have been able to understand her points of view and see things in a new light, even if I do not necessarily agree with her. I have been able to understand her words, though in a different language, and through her words I have been able to see her beautiful heart.

But I first have to understand her words in order to understand her heart. 

...Profound, huh?

But it is so incredibly true. Think about it. How many times have you been at dinner with somebody, but only half listened because you were too occupied with the number of notifications you had on Facebook? How many times have you neglected to hear your little sister request to go for a walk or play barbies because you were too busy reading a book, watching TV, or checking your email? I certainly know I am guilty of it.

People always say things like:

I totally understand. That must be so hard. 
I definitely know what you are going through. 
I cannot imagine being where you are. 

Yes, these kind phrases can be helpful. But did that person take the time to truly listen - to truly understand- what exactly they are thinking, feeling, and going through? Or did they simply listen to the problem half-heartedly, not asking any deeper questions, and skipping straight to the easy-to-say, cliche maxims that anyone on the planet could say to the person undergoing a dilemma.

My experience has been different, of course, because of the language barrier. Although it is more true in a foreign setting, I still believe that intently listening is something I have neglected greatly in my life.  But it is only when I truly listen and ask deeper questions that I can understand what they are saying. Then, I can understand with my heart.

Then, I can love. 

¿Valencia como Williamsburg?

En los Estados Unidos, he visitado un sitio se llama Williamsburg tres veces con mi familia y con mi colegio. Cuando se va a Williamsburg, se experimenta la vida de los americanos durante el siglo XVIII.  No sólo hay tiendas, tabernas, y lugares de trabajo, sino también las personas llevan la ropa de esta época, hablan con un acento británico, y realizan la reconstrucción de los hechos, como los discursos y las batallas.  

Me encantaba este tipo de sociedad porque demuestre un sentimiento de comunidad; era una cultura más lente, con personas que valen las amistades y disfrutan del tiempo que tienen. 

                

Aunque no hay reconstrucciones de los hechos del pasado en Valencia (excepto las de Las Fallas), el sentimiento de comunidad en Valencia parece lo de Williamsburg.  En mi camino del instituto, cada día pasa cafeterías, pastelerías (mi absoluta favorita), fruterías, hornearías  bollerías, restaurantes, y otras tiendas innumerables.

Siempre los españoles llenan las sillas, hablando, contando cosas, tomando café, y comiendo.  

Esto es una distinción de la cultura española, que como la cultura vieja de los Estados Unidos, me encanta.  

Cuando llegué a Valencia y Dr. Wiseman nos dijo que las reuniones con amigos no están en las casas, no entendí.  Pensé ¿Cómo puedo pasar tiempo con otras personas? En los Estados Unidos, quedamos en las casas, o a veces en una cafetería o restaurante.  Pero normalmente, si quedo con un amigo es para hablar sobre algo importante o para celebrar una ocasión especial.  Como me he hecho una parte de la cultura española, he notado la gran ventaja de las reuniones en cafeterías.  No sólo puede pasar tiempo con mis amigas y disfrutar de las pasteles uno o dos veces por semana, sino también puede desarrollar una relación nueva con las trabajadores y los dueños de las cafeterías.  Crea la comunidad verdadera – tal vez la misma persona que posee la cafetería donde tomo café compra la fruta y verdura de mi tienda. 
¡Es menos una cultura de correr, correr, correr, y más de sentar, hablar, disfrutar, como en los días viejos de los Estados Unidos! 

Que?!

Hello from Spain! I have been here for almost three weeks, and it has been an adventure, to say the least. This picture of my face pretty much describes how I've felt since I've been here. 

There have been so many times that I have not understood my family's instructions solely because I cannot understand what they are saying, even though I have been studying Spanish for 7 years. At times, this is beyond frustrating, and I find myself saying "Que?" (meaning "What?") more times than I would like. The language, however, is not the only thing that is causing me to say "WHAT?!?!" 

I am studying in a foreign country. I am living with a family I have never met. I am trying to navigate my way around the city (if you don't know me, I am the worst at directions). I am attempting to make sure I maintain my relationships at home while simultaneously make new friendships here. I am learning Spanish in a completely different way than I ever have. I am trying to be content. 

And I am learning that I cannot. 

I really can't. For the first time in my life, I realize in a very real way that I can't do this alone. I can't show grace and love to the people surrounding me when I truly don't feel like showing grace and love. I cannot handle all of the newness and the change. I cannot juggle all of my relationships and handle everything in the best possible way. 

I can't. But God can. I have to rely on Him.

It's only been three weeks, and I am already questioning God. I am already asking "WHAT!?" "Why did you bring me here at this time?!" "What is your plan in all of this?" "QUE!??!?!" 

I don't know anything, and I think that's God's point. He wants me to trust Him with every step, with every breath, with every part of me. So He put me in a place where I have to do that. What a God I serve. He's making me more like Him.

I'm currently clinging to these verses: 

Galatians 5:4-6

You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace. But by faith we eagerly await through the Spirit the righteousness for which we hope. For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.

Psalm 33: 13-22

From heaven the Lord looks down and sees all mankind; from His dwelling place he watches all who live on earth - He who forms the hearts of all, who considers everything they do. No king is saved by the size of his army; no warrior escapes by his great strength. A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; despite all its great strength it cannot save. But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear Him, on those who hope in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help and shield. In HIM our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in You.