Foster Care & True Adventure

I can remember standing in the pews of Liberty Baptist Church as a teenager, where I started to get it all, this Gospel-love that satisfies our deepest desires and hopes and dreams. I can remember singing the lyrics to The Wonderful Cross.

Oh, the wonderful Cross!
Oh, the wonderful Cross!
Bids me come & die
And find that I may truly live.

I can remember singing the words and meaning them, but not quite understanding. I can remember thinking about what it meant to lay down my life, to pick up my cross, to die -- so that I could live.

Isn't this a weird thing about our faith? That we are called to lay down our lives so that we can live? This goes against everything that our culture and society and social media tell us - that true life comes through dying.

I've been thinking a lot about adventure because a lot of people on my news feed are hiking or starting businesses or traveling to Europe. This is what I would consider adventure. Isn't it what you would consider adventure? Daring to do something that pushes your limits and makes you think bigger and changes your perspective? 

But even the most amazing adventures - the jumping out of airplanes, the mission trips, the camps - are followed by a return to normal, to monotonous, to a job that we do or don't like, to a life we are unsure we want, to wearing ourselves out trying to make it. It's a reminder that even the best of the best adventure still doesn't satisfy.

So, I've been thinking: while those adventures are good and maybe even necessary, they aren't the real deal. They're close, they're on the right track, but they've missed the mark. Maybe True Adventure is in the laying it all down, in the giving it all up, in the surrender, in the dying.

There was no resurrection until there was a crucifixion.

I am about to embark on an adventure with my amazing husband, Teej. We are delving into the world of Foster Care. We have felt God press on our hearts with a certainty that we can't quite explain.

Most would not call our adventure an adventure, though. In fact, many have told us how the odds are stacked against us. Maybe they are not deliberately discouraging us from doing what God has called us to do. But we can hear it in their disapproving tone, in their story of foster-care failure, in their silence. They don't see Foster Care as True Adventure. They see Foster Care as a Life Sentence to misery.

I am currently on a plane on my way back to Dallas. I started thinking about this because I just heard Maria Goff talk about intention on Jamie Ivey's podcast "The Happy Hour" (highly recommend). She said something that stuck with me: that when you're living your life, you have to wave a white flag and declare, "THIS IS HOW I WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE! AND I'M GOING TO DO IT!"

It becomes all too easy to let our jobs and friends and churches and expectations and schedules run us. When this happens, we lose the opportunity to lay down our lives daily and intentionally seek out ways to serve, to give, to love, to die.

Sounds weird, right? Because dying?! --- dying isn't what we want! Dying is sad, causes grief, breeds pain. But that's the crazy truth of the Gospel:
Through the rejection, suffering, and sorrow of the Cross, Jesus came back to life.
Through the sadness, grief, and pain of choosing death of our selves, we gain new life.

True Joy is only found in the True Adventure.


And True Adventure is giving it all up.


And when we give it all up, that's where we find Jesus.


Because He gave it all up. He already lived the True Adventure, and He wants us to know the same love, the same hope, the same joy, that He does.


But the problem is - this True Adventure - it doesn't just show up at our doorstep. God doesn't send a message to us in our mailboxes, telling us the next step. This Adventure that God takes us on - this journey - there's no instruction guide.

Of course, I want to wait on God, to be sure that this is what He wants, but constantly waiting for a huge sign in the sky telling me what to do next is a little cray-cray. Yes, God wants us to trust Him, to pray for Him to move, but I don't think that should be apart from our actions. He wants us to move with Him, to live life with intention, to say, "I'm going to live my life THIS WAY," and then -- ACTUALLY DO IT.

I have ideas about what I want my life to be: I want to show others Jesus, I want to be generous, I want to be kind, loving, and hospitable, I want to be a good neighbor and friend, I want to mother the motherless and help the least of these. It's not that I have totally neglected these desires; some of these come out in my teaching or in our youth ministry or in my friendships or family relationships. But I've never intentionally decided: This is how I want my life to be. And this is how I'm going to do it.

Because surrender, dying, sacrifice - this stuff is hard. But, as Ann Voskamp says in The Broken Way, "spending yourself is how you multiply joy." So the way to true joy is through sacrifice. The way to abundance is giving it all away - time, money, love. It's backwards and it's hard, but it's what Jesus said too: "The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life." (John 12:25)


When we take up our cross and follow Christ, He gives us "life abundant." (John 10:10)

And so this is why I consider Foster Care part of our True Adventure. God has called us to "care for the widow and the orphan," and as people have pointed out to us, it ain't gon be easy.

BUT it's going to be worth it. And so...
-- we choose to open our home
so that little ones with no home
can experience the love, hope, and joy
of the Savior who left His home for us.

Update on our Foster Care journey: We are almost done paper work and waiting on scheduling our Home Study to be approved! We are so excited and would appreciate any prayer and encouragement you can give!

Lastly, an excerpt from Jeremiah 22 that really opened up my eyes to what God cares about:

“Woe to him who builds his palace by unrighteousness,
    his upper rooms by injustice,
making his own people work for nothing,
    not paying them for their labor.
14 He says, ‘I will build myself a great palace
    with spacious upper rooms.’
So he makes large windows in it,
    panels it with cedar
    and decorates it in red.

15 “Does it make you a king
    to have more and more cedar?
Did not your father have food and drink?
    He did what was right and just,
    so all went well with him.
16 He defended the cause of the poor and needy,
    and so all went well.
Is that not what it means to know me?”
    declares the Lord.
17 “But your eyes and your heart
    are set only on dishonest gain,
on shedding innocent blood
    and on oppression and extortion.”

Your Life Still Matters

I have noticed a trend these days. It is a trend of praising and glorifying women who start businesses, who step out in faith, who do extraordinary things, travel, speak in front of thousands, who write and have their words read by millions. We praise them because we should praise them. Because women have real voices and ideas and dreams and are accomplishing those dreams and that's stinking awesome.

I am definitely not bashing this move toward reading and listening to intelligent, God-fearing women. I'm all about it. In fact, I listen to Jamie Ivey's podcast, "The Happy Hour," to and from work because it's SO much better than listening to the same five pop songs on the radio (for real). I so love listening to their stories, how they're growing in Jesus, how they're turning their dreams into realities, and what that looks like as a mom and a wife and a follower of Christ. It inspires me, makes me want to get up off my butt and do something for the kingdom. It makes me think big, dream big, hope big. And I love all of those things and all of these women.

But I think we may be entering dangerous territory, here.

Because sometimes, when I'm listening to this podcast, or reading a story about a woman entrepreneur, or following a Christian woman blogger/foster mom on Instagram, I start to believe a lie. I start to believe a lie that my everyday, hard, teaching job is not important. I start to  think that what I'm doing in our youth ministry, serving and loving high school and middle school girls, is not enough.

Maybe I should do something bigger. Maybe I should write a Bible study or start a program for foster families or DO SOMETHING BIG. Because big is what feels exciting and awesome and where people find God?

In the word of Donald Trump, WRONG.

My life as a teacher, as a wife, as a youth leader matters. The work that I do - day in and day out - matters. My friend Lindsay's life as a wife and mom of a three-year-old matters. Does someone hear about her story everyday? No. My sister's journey toward becoming a nurse, and my friend Carly's career as a nurse - it matters. My mom's relationships with people that no one else sees - her mentor-ship and her love for them - it is of high value.

We don't have do do big and glorious things to impact the Kingdom, to be excited about God, to see His faithfulness in our everyday life. In fact, if we think we have do something that everyone in the world will see and love in order to make God happy, then I think we are looking in the wrong places.

No, real Gospel change, real post-Jesus, I'm-in-love-with-Him change happens in the everyday, small acts of washing dishes and redirecting in a classroom and helping an elderly man get back to his hospital bed. And I am sure those wonderful women starting businesses are doing that too. But I want to call attention to the quiet, faithful people who, knowing they will receive no recognition, complete small, ordinary acts of extraordinary love. These people mirror the faithfulness of God.

Because the everyday, down-and-dirty, clean the bathroom, love-choice shows and treasures Jesus just as much as the big-picture, I'm-starting-an-amazing-non-profit, social-media posts. If I may be so bold, the first matters shows and treasures Him more.

Because did Jesus come to earth clothed in a royal robe and riding on a magnificent horse and chariot? Did He rush to a throne and demand for praise and honor and for all to bow down to the one and only true King? Did he arrive with angel's trumpets and  people praising His name? Was Jesus crowned with a crown that He deserves, lined with jewels and diamonds and rubies of highest quality?

No, Jesus came to earth, born from a girl who experienced the judgment and scorn from the "religious" when they saw that she was having a baby (if they only knew!) out of wedlock. Jesus was born a baby, in a stable with a bunch of dirty animals. Jesus humbly spoke the truth in love, often calling people out on their crap and loving people when they least deserved it. Jesus was given a crown of thorns, a crown that mocked and tore at His skin. He was sentenced to a death that He didn't deserve and rejection from His father because he bore the curse that should have been ours.

It's upside-down, peeps. God's Kingdom works backwards. And when we faithfully serve, and consistently love, and show up for the broken, the sinners, the least-of-these, the needy, the sick, the vulnerable, and when we do it without the recognition or acknowledgement that we deserve, that is when He shapes us to become more like Him - humble, truthful, kind, loving, etc.

I used to get upset when people would say, "God's Kingdom is not about you." This statement would confuse me and cause me to question my faith. I would think Well, God, then I guess it's all about you and we don't even matter. 

Years later, looking back I realize that the original statement is true, and that I got the interpretation all wrong. I was all out of wack - still somehow thinking only about myself. Now I understand that our lives, our choices, our thoughts, our every-days matter to God. We are valuable to God. BUT He knows that we only experience the true joy of knowing Him when we give it all up. 

It's not about our worth or our value; it's about our joy and our willingness to put it all on the line for the Gospel, the stinking-good-news. And we do that in the mundane, every-day tasks, the menial folding, the call to our best friend when it may not be the best time, the thoughtful note sent, the kiss on a cheek to a tired and worn-out husband, the forgiveness given to someone who doesn't deserve it, the pulling-in of someone who is on the outskirts, the perseverance in love when your kid defies you, the decorating for a night to honor someone.

JESUS is in these things, y'all, as much as He is in the life-changing campaigns and businesses and non-profits. And I'm working everyday to believe it.

These verses in Philippians 2:6-8 remind me of the kind of amazing God we serve, and it makes me want to be more like Him everyday:

Though he was God, 
he did not think of equality with God 
as something to cling to.

Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; 
he took the humble position of a slave
and was born as a human being.

When he appeared in human form, 
he humbled himself in obedience to God 
and died a criminal's death on a cross.